COMING TO A CLOSE

As the day reaches it's end I reflect on what I have achieved today, mull over the things I could have changed and look to tomorrow. Tomorrow's bigger than you and me. It can be the first day or the last. It can be a beginning or an end. As I sit here surrounded by the possessions of a dearly departed loved one I find myself pondering - what do we leave behind? Deep I know but I find myself reflecting about the person I am now and the people I used to be. Recently I received some lovely and very sweet and considerate messages from people I haven't spoken to in a long time. In some ways I feel that the closer I reach to the end of this decade, this chapter of my life, I am actually repeating my life from the start of this decade. Can life really go full circle? <strong>So now there's a choice to be made.</strong> Either feel regret, self pity and remorse as I feel I have taken a backslide? Or See this as an opportunity to start a new decade. Right from the beginning. <em>If I could do it all again</em> We say this phrase but do we really want to do it all again even if we think we can make it better. I have to start my life again. Whether it's new or continuing I don't know but it has to move forward. Someone said to me the other day that there is no time. There's only now. So what are we waiting for? We're wasting time. One thing i know for sure is that whatever has happened has happened. <strong>It's unchangeable. </strong> <strong>It's been and gone. </strong> <strong>It might still be in our thoughts. </strong> <strong>We may still be suffering or enjoying or learning from it but it's gone.</strong> As much as we need to learn to open doors so must we remember to close some. There's no point in staring at an empty room waiting for it to bring itself to life with what it did before. It won't and it can't. <strong>So I move forward.</strong> A close on all the stresses and sadnesses of today and yesterday. I'm not fooled to think that tomorrow won't bring new sadness but it'll be easier to face when I'm not weighed down by past troubles. I may not be out of the tunnel yet but I can see the door at the end now. Keep Smiling :) Sarah-Beth xx